Isn't love is desire?

To be honest, I don't an answer for it. Everyone deserves to be fall in love with someone to fill up their desire. Am I right?.... However, I've been never fall in love with someone matured. hahahahah, yuh it's humour anymore. I had a partner, when I was 15 years old and I found that I'm so sensitive when it comes to relationship. As a proof, I got a worst result in PT3 (luckily, I did best in my SPM). See.... How broke am I during the school. Reminiscing back, I felt, I'm so immature and innocent. It's too early to have a commitment, dude. So, I start to love someone again when I was 18 with intention to test how I able to handle my relationship.Unfortunately, I'm really dumb to flirt someone :')  However, I observed that I likely to attract people with my abilities and personalities. It still working until now. As I expect, nobody I like would notice me..... It's hurt right ?

But, I'll never blame them because I'm so complicated asf in mentally & appearance as well. Why I should think this way?. I guess I'm a 'beast' and still waiting for a 'beauty'. She's the only one who understands me, with a destructive, complicated, confuse and borderline me. Writing about these attributes, realize am I too girly? I don't know how to explain but this is what make me who I am now. I'm not to choose to born this way. Back to main topic, isn't love is important for me now?... No, and agree if...seeking love from your mutual is enough. To love someone is a fckin big matter. A word COMMITMENTS potrays how much positive behavior I should hold for. Moreover, Self-improvement is also part of commitment that I do now.

I admit, growing to be adult is difficult... You'll see your friends getting married or having a sweet-gummy relationship. Suddenly, it affects you to demand to have it too. So, what's you gonna do? I would say.... Play safe. Love is not something that you can push it away or stop for you to feel it. There's different between play safe and 'player'. The key is a hope. Usually, player would promise and put high hopes on you, to end up it's all fake. Even so, you'll more enjoy to know people if you play safe... Thus, do you think love is desire for you when it'll comes to you naturally ? (written faith)